Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in tiffany's LiveJournal:

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Monday, August 29th, 2005
10:19 pm	um yeah... i needed that vacation in the worst way!...i had a blast :)... i got pierced again...just in the ear...but it looks sweet!... haven't heard from ireland...well i am not surprised... "ordinary people" won a moon man last night...i chuckled and thought of you... i think you are cute...but i heard you were a (how do i say this nicely)...FLIRT!... i might have a stalker...AGAIN...apparently i am the stalking type!... less than a month and i come back...I CAN'T WAIT!... school starts soon... g'night! Current Mood: blah Current Music: "i couldn't see how every sign, pointed straight to you" (4 thoughts | lay one down)
Friday, August 19th, 2005
8:24 pm	it's only been like 2 years...so here it goes... he left...and he came back...and now i wish i would have kept my mouth shut...not that i expected it to be easy...but there are just some things i will NOT compromise...and i am sorry sweetheart...THAT is one of them...so i guess i will be giving you up...LOL...for a second time...the irony in that situation just makes me chuckle... YOU CAME HOME...i was soooooo excited to hear your voice...we still gotta hang out...but let me tell you...i am ridiculously proud to call you my friend... i loved my b-day...one of my most amazing friends couldn't be there...which made me sad...but i had a blast...just ask everyone who was there...LOL :)...i LOVE my friends!...i love the digital camera i got from my sis and her BF...i am finally stepping up in the world :)...AND i love the ring i got too...but thats a whole different story...too much history goes there... i am leaving in exactly 2 days...i am SOOOOOOO excited i could scream :)...there is nothing like a vacation at the end of summer!!!...we are all broke as hell...but none of us care...we will be on our way with empty pockets...a car full of fun...and enough clothes to dress an entire country :)..."all hands in...all bets off"...road trip 05!!!!... i get to go to the cruise tomorrow :)...i LOVE cars...and i love hot "people" in cars...and there will be plenty of both there tomorrow :)... i think that's all...i am in love with everything right now :)...so i will end it on that note... Current Mood: hyper Current Music: "...a little voice inside my head said don't look back..." (2 thoughts | lay one down)
Wednesday, July 20th, 2005
8:42 pm	it's only been forever since i have written in here... i'm only gonna give you guys a little bit of my life... I MISS HIM...and it's only been days!!!...but i do have a calming sense of knowing it's all gonna be ok...it's weird...in all the years people used to leave me for periods of time...i NEVER felt like this...i hope it's a good sign!!!... working is sweet...i am learning about cars...i LOVE it :)!... that's all you get for now...have a good one my cute people! Current Mood: busy Current Music: "...there's someone out there who feels just like me..." (lay one down)
Tuesday, June 28th, 2005
11:51 am	OMGoodness!... i got a letter from Ft. Sill, OK...i love this kid!!!...he amazes me everyday of my life!...i am SOOOO proud of him...and i can't wait to see him when he gets home!!!...it's only been like a week and a half and i ALL READY got a letter :)...i can't wait to hug him :)! Current Mood: giddy (1 thought | lay one down)
Monday, June 27th, 2005
1:11 pm	it's been weird... EDIT: this is nothing you need to know! Current Mood: sad Current Music: "maybe you'll stay, maybe you'll leave, maybe you'll return" (lay one down)
Friday, June 24th, 2005
10:01 pm	soooooooooo... EDIT: i can't wait!!!... so i like that you left without saying good-bye...it all good bro...you see...i realized that it really didn't bother me...it actually is a sigh of relief that i don't care...and i LOVE every second of it...i just thought you all would like to know :)... so i think we are going to boston...not til the end of summer...but i am game...and apparently there is someone there waiting for me to play :)...naaahahahahaha!... i am waiting to hear on that job...i am gonna call on monday...it would be mega sweet if i got the job...keep your fingers crossed!... anyone not doing anything on july 3rd...come to my church and see me getting baptized on tape...it happend a couple weeks ago...but this is just the play back...i am excited...and you should all come and see it :)!... i can't wait for you to come home...there have been SOOO many times i wanted to call you up this summer and hang out...its only been a week...ARG...i have so much more time to wait!...i hope you are doing ok over there...kick some ass baby!... ok i think i am done for now...y'all have a great night and i will see ya's soon!... Current Mood: excited Current Music: "...it doesn't matter if it's good enough..." (lay one down)
Tuesday, June 21st, 2005
4:44 pm	so here's the deal... I NEED TO BE IN UNIFORM!!!... the end! Current Mood: aggravated Current Music: "...where at least i know i'm free..." (lay one down)
Thursday, June 16th, 2005
1:19 pm	and the day has finally come... it was so long ago when you told me what day you were leaving...i can't believe its actually here...ARG!...i was up at 4:45 this morning to make one last phone call...i know its only for a short amount of time...but still...just knowing that i can't actually call you up when i want to sort of really sucks!...i hope you like your presents...i owe you big when you come home kid :)...take care of yourself...kick some ass...and just know that i am gonna miss you!... i really do look up to you...and i don't even think you know it...the irony of the entire situation is that you are younger than me...LOL...well make no mistake...some of the wisest people i know are younger than me...age does not discriminate against wisdom... can you imagine what its gonna be like when you are actually gone for good...CRAZY...i should start now for your going away present :)... i hope you can get out early...at least early enough for my b-day...i know you said you'll try...thats about all i needed to hear :)... so when the time comes for me to leave...you best be rubbing my head for 45 minutes...LOL...i'm gonna hold you to it :)!...one day it's gonna be me...and i know you will be right there believing in me!!!...and scratching my feet...LOL :)... ok i think i am done talking about you now...i just hate when people i care about leave for long periods of time...i know i will see them again one day...but ask anyone...its hard to say good bye to someone you care about...but i think i am learning...i used to cry and be a really BIG baby...now i just suck it up and say "i'll see ya later"...it's only a couple months right... i'm out cute peeps... p.s. i'll be waiting for a letter :) Current Mood: grateful Current Music: "...and defend her still today..." (lay one down)
Tuesday, June 14th, 2005
12:07 pm	it's been a while... well there has been 4 million things going on...of course... i talked to someone a couple weeks ago...and i always thought it was different...i NEVER ever thought that the change that was made was for the worse...i always thought i did somethng amazing...well i got a rude awakening the other night...it was completely the opposite of what i thought...i didn't know what to say...i still don't...i guess "i'm sorry"...not that that fixes ANYTHING...but its a start!... i really don't know what i am gonna do for 2 months...i can't believe it starts in 2 days...its gonna be weird all over again...not being able to call you...not being able to eat ice cream with you...2 months man...and you are missing my b-day :(...thats ok...you came out last year...LOL...it was sweet :)...anywho...you are one of my bestests'...i am gonna miss you...keep on keepin' on...take care of yourself...and i will see you in a couple :)... other people are sweet as hell...meaning people related to me...they are a joke...i just want everyone to know...i am doing what you said to do...see there is still a point where you know me better than anyone in my life... i feel like i'm staring in my own version of "The Italian Job"...and here is why...in the movie after they get deceived by one of the guys...they find him later on and see that he has bought everything that they said they wanted...its like he doesn't have any idea what HE wants...he has to buy what everyone else wants...well let me tell you...I KNOW WHAT THATS LIKE...i have one of my own living under the same roof as me...all my dreams...everything i want...SHE has to have...even my friends...all i can do is laugh...i didn't know my hopes and ambitions were that amazing that someone else had to have EXACTLY what i want...in a twisted way...its kind of flattering!!!... every single day there is something that comes along that reminds me of what i have been missing for the past 4 years...i told someone the other night that i want to do it now...i am afraid i will lose my nerve...but then i realized that the feeling never goes away...its something i have wanted to do for 4 years now...why would it just all of a sudden change???...its not going to...especially since i see something every single day that just makes me want to do it even more...i can't wait...i want it SO bad... ok i think i am done...for now...if you want to know more...get a hold of me... Current Mood: blah Current Music: "...i don't wanna wait..." (1 thought | lay one down)
Thursday, June 2nd, 2005
11:08 pm	blah blah blah...blah blah blah blah... those are the thoughts running through my head right now...just so everyone is clear!... i am still sad about what happened with us...i don't know how to deal with it yet...i should be used to you breaking my heart...but that is something you never really get used to... so i got this guy who is really awesome...and i am talking off the charts...i don't know what to do...all i want are butterflies...is that so much to ask... i haven't seen you in 3 months...but let me tell you...i STILL think about our rendezvous outside the hall...that is something that will NEVER leave my mind!... i keep waiting for a phone call...the one phone call i will get that will change my life...i want this more than anything!... i get baptized on saturday...i am excited and nervous... i think i am gonna go...BTW the pistons disappointed tonight... g'night! "i once was lost...but now am found..." Current Mood: indifferent Current Music: "...and defend her still today..." (lay one down)
Tuesday, May 31st, 2005
7:09 pm	blah blah blah... so i got a phone call today...its taking everything inside of me to not cry...and i know to most of you that doesn't mean much...but let me tell you...its a hard thing to hear...not that its the end of the road...its just that i feel like its all gonna start all over again...i have wanted this for so long...i know things that are worth it NEVER come easy...Lord knows i have experienced that...i guess just once i want things to fall in to place...i am not gonna give up...but we will see how it goes...i am a lot upset about the chance that i won't be able to fly...my medical history is pretty crazy...for those of you that know me...and she said today that its highly unlikely...which hurts my heart a lot...but i have been through worse heartaches than this...TRUST ME...i will get through this...i just have to keep the faith!... you completely disappointed me the other night...i never would have thought something like that could happen between us...i have been there through everything...i guess you have served your purpose in my life...so i thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me become the person i am today...and i wish you all the best...you will always have a special place in my heart...i will never forget you...but after 5 years of ups and downs...i am finally able to say good-bye kid...and for the first time in my life...i know its for real...i don't have that sad sinking feeling...or that i am saying it but i don't mean it attitude...this is it...i will always love you...but i have learned that just because there is someone in your life you will always love...doesn't mean they are meant to be in your life forever...your friendship has meant the world to me...and i am happy you have been a part of my life for so long...i wish you the best in pursuing your dreams...never give up!...and i will leave you with this..."so we land...only to find we never left the ground..." as for you...at this point in my life i don't know what i would do without you...you never cease to amaze me...i never thought in a million years you would drive that far just to be by my side...you were there when certain people in my life that never should have let me down...DID...you sat there with me for 3 hours and wiped away my tears...you are one of the best friends that i have...being without you for 2 months is NOT gonna be a good thing...i love you kid...from the bottom of my heart thank you!... so i think thats all...i am trying to do everything in my life i have watch pass me by for the last 4 years...i know there is going to be some difficulty...but i will get through it...if i put my mind to something i KNOW it can be done...for those of you that know that and believe it...thank you!... "as we grow up...we learn that the one person who isn't supposed to let us down probably will...and the one person that you never thought would be there for you...is...you're going to have fights with your friends...you're going to lose some of your friends...you may even fall in love with one of your friends...you will eventually be hurt...no matter how tough you are...people are going to hate you...love you...love to hate you...and hate to love you...but the ones you mean the most to will always be there" i am out for now...PEACE! Current Mood: distressed (1 thought | lay one down)
Wednesday, May 25th, 2005
6:57 pm	it's been a while... but here it goes... do you beleive in signs?!?!...I DO...and let me tell you...God has a weird way of working them into your life...so i saw the "Angels" fly on sunday...that was the most amazingly beautiful thing i have ever seen in my life...i didn't know what to say...it rained the entire time we were there...and then when they announced that the "Angels" were getting ready to fly...it literally stopped raining and the sun came out...all i could do was look up with tears in my eyes and say "i get it"...i was feeling 47 different emotions all rolled in to one...i have never really gotten over that...and for those of you that know me...you know how much it has hurt these past 4 years... i talked to you that same night...i swear i love you...you have helped me through so much these days...you made me see that there is something i can do to make it better...and that i need to do this because i will regret it later...and that you will stand behind me no matter what decision i make...i really don't know what i would do without you...it's gonna be bad enough you're gonna be gone this summer...doing something that i can't wait to do :)...things happen for a reason and you made me see that...and like you said...there is a reason we were brought together...and maybe this is it!...thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!... i think about you everyday of my life...and i think about the chance i was given...and in the same breath i threw it away...i really don't know what to think about the situation at hand...or that was at hand...i don't want to read too much into it...but i don't know if i can just walk away either...how many times is fate going to deal me something like that before it just passes me by...i don't want that or you to pass me by...i mean "i know i lost you once...and i know i can do it again...if i thought that's what you really wanted"...i don't know if i wanna take that chance...of course i have left it up to chance this far and it has given me more questions to answers that we won't admit...how does that work?!?!...if you ever want to know what its like to ignore something that has been SO strong for so many years...just ask me...i will tell you all about the weight it puts on your heart!...i've learned to be numb...just like you!... i think i am done for now...OH EXCEPT...i am shouting out to all my friends that i haven't seen in ages b/c i have no phone...you know who you are...teeny...miss l.a...my cute polish girl...you know who you are...we need to hang out this summer like it's going out of style :)...i miss you guys!... "life is like an hour glass glued to the table" Current Mood: numb Current Music: "...these words are my diary screaming out loud..." (lay one down)
Friday, May 20th, 2005
4:41 pm	i wasn't gonna update... there really isn't much going on...my dad is sweet and takes vacations all the time...i don't have a rich BF who can save my a**...i might not have a car real soon...i might not be going to school in the fall...i am STILL trying to find a job...i think the entire state of MI has gotten my resume...WORK WITH ME HERE... so those are all the stupid things...now the good stuff... my "formal" (or what i am calling my formal) is gonna be awesome :)...on that same day i think i am getting baptized (my mom doesn't know yet)...we are going to see a sweet show on the 30th (naaaaahahahaha)...i have found who i want to make out with all summer (i just have to get him to agree)...we HAVE to take some road trips this summer (and talk about nothing and everything)...i NEED to see my old school back in the day friends who are home from school...or who are mega busy like me and we haven't been able to get together (you know who you are don't make me mention names :P)... more good stuff... i get to be with him :)...in the future...naaaaaaaaahahahahaha...long story don't ask...and you get to roll up in a sweet ride...LOL :)...i'm sorry but that was amazing :)...we are such girls!!!... i keep thinking about that ONE summer...do you remember it...i know you do...i actually put you guys in my CD player a couple days ago!!!..."it was real...wasn't it?...all those years ago?"...LOL...i think i would have to agree with the woman... i think thats all...i need a vacation (LIKE MY DAD)...see y'all on the flipside!...PEACE! Current Mood: depressed Current Music: "...once a long time ago..." (lay one down)
Monday, May 16th, 2005
4:01 pm	well... in the .25 seconds it was real...it's now gone...and the best part about it...i told you to do it...oh well...you win some...you lose some...i just keep losing...that's all... it's my fault...i wish i would've had someone on my side!... Current Mood: numb Current Music: "...i wish i could be..." (1 thought | lay one down)
Thursday, May 12th, 2005
10:51 pm	i don't even know how to articulate this right now... of course you made the list...and i can't believe you thought otherwise...like i said...you are one of the 2 people...i am glad we are friends...i don't know what i'd do without you...and thats the truth!...and i have faith you will know which way to go...trust yourself...you might be surprised!...p.s. thanks for my CD sweetie :)!... i got my DVD back...i am so excited that i just might go watch it tonight :)!... so this guy...i don't know what to think about it just yet...i had it all figured out until i saw you tonight...as awesome as he is...i remember what it was like...even though its not there anymore...i don't know if i want anything less than that for the rest of my life...help a girl out!!!... ok i am done for now...of course today seemed like it was directly out of the twilight zone...but i got a lot accomplished...it feels good!... i will see you all real soon!... Current Mood: indescribable Current Music: nothing can describe what i am feeling! (lay one down)
Tuesday, May 10th, 2005
3:51 pm	time is a funny thing... i wasn't expecting that...i hope you are ok...i know you will be...no matter what i am here for you...keep your chin up kid...you'll be ok!... i always joked about 5 years later...its funny how sometimes you get the chance to see it...ya know... OMGosh...Noah and Ali...i think i just gave myself the chills...i heart them...i do!... i am gonna go running...i wanna look cute in my formal attire :)... this is a warning to EVERYONE out there...i am crazy so be careful around me...lol :)... enjoy the weather my cute people!!!...I LOVE SUMMER!... "i wish i could be more than you wanted all the time..." Current Mood: anxious Current Music: "...its nights like these...that make u feel so far away..." (lay one down)
Sunday, May 8th, 2005
6:46 pm	it's been a lil while... so i have had a little bit of time to do some soul searching...so gimme a second... i feel left out...i guess thats what i signed up for...but still...it's gonna be hard...and i know i can do it...it's just that i read things...and it makes me want to be there...and i know i will never really go away...but i feel like i am going to miss out on something that is really important...and then in a couple months i am gonna be the girl sitting there not knowing what everyone else is talking about...b/c it happened when i was "out of it"... i went to church today and i have homework...LOL...how awesome is that...so some of you will be hearing from me for various reasons...actually just one reason...but you will have to wait and find out what it is!... i hate having to settle old scores...but this is something that needs to be done...so you will be hearing from me as well... my life...well you have to ask if you wanna know!... i miss you...LOL...there are actually a lot of people that "i miss you" can apply to...but as of lately i have caught myself thinking more and more...this of course is "our" weather...LOL...so that should give it away my darlings...for those of you who "really" know me... my dearest friends...i keep thinking about you guys more and more as well...its weird for me to think that i am still friends with people i knew in 1st grade...and even high school...how does that happen...i guess there are people in your life that are never meant to leave...someone special (at the time) told me..."some people come in to your life for a reason...a season...but end up staying for a lifetime"...the ones that tell you they will be here for a lifetime...are usually the ones that end up saying good-bye...it's the ones that don't say anything about their walk in to your life...and how long they plan on staying...that seem to withstand any amount of reasons and seasons!... as for my girls...you know who you are...there is a reason why you guys walked in to my life...and there is a reason why you are still here...my life changed that one day in September...and to this day you ladies continue to add to it...too many reasons...a few seasons...but one lifetime together :)!... M: "we need to do something this summer thats worth remembering forever!" A: "WOW...i just got the chills when you said that!"" .....carpe diem...and we will my darling...i have no doubts!... ok i think i am done now...i am gonna go watch some TV...my shows are on soon...c'yas on the flipside! Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: "...i'd still pick my friends over you..." (lay one down)
Thursday, May 5th, 2005
12:16 pm	NAAAAHAHAHAHA... that was the best conversation i have ever had online with ANYONE :)...i love that we just talked about it all!...and i love that we have found a common ground!...i can't wait til my phone call tomorrow :)...and i can't wait til i get my DVD back...we are sweet and i LOVE it :)!..."get ready to have some fun"!!!... on a gloomier note...i am sick again...this is some crap i tell you...i am always sick...this needs to stop...i am now accpeting applications for a healthy immune system...mine sucks!... ok i am gonna go lie down...LIE...hahahahaha...yes you do!...ok i am done now...i for real need to rest...i will catch y'all on the flipside!... p.s. even though i am sick...nothing can ruin my day thanks to that conversation :)!... p.p.s. "you're just another player...playing in the name of love..." Current Mood: amused Current Music: "...don't want you back...cuz you're no good..." (lay one down)
Tuesday, May 3rd, 2005
4:50 pm	DATE DETAILS... picked me up...looked really cute...according to everyone in the house...lol :)...went out to dinner...he paid for me...awwww how cute :)...after that we went and visited his friend...who was f-ing adorable...then we rented a scary movie...smooth on his part i think...he knew i would be scared and want to hold on to him...we talked the whole night...there was never a moment of silence...he makes me laugh and it was awesome :)...i finally got back at like 1 in the morning...all in all it was a good night... there is just one problem...and if you know me you all ready know what it is...all i want is a nice guy like that to give me the butterflies...not all these assholes that keep hurting me...i've decided that instead of doing things like i normally do...which is if i don't get butterflies than this must not be the person for me...i will just chill out and see how it goes...at least i know he is interested in me and he won't play f-ing mind games...i've come to the conclusion that every guy that has ever given me butterflies...which i expect nothing less than that...has hurt me...so why keep going for the guys that give you butterflies at first glance when all they do is break your heart in the end...right?!?!...we shall see...i mean the guy is cute as hell...and actually isn't scared to like somoene...so i know this is a crazy concept...but i'm gonna see where it goes... i am gonna go for now...y'all stay cute!...and we need to hang out soon :)!!!... p.s. 144 DAYS!!! Current Mood: weird Current Music: "...my weakness is...that i care too much..." (2 thoughts | lay one down)
Sunday, May 1st, 2005
11:29 pm	P.S. HE HAS A BOAT...and as if it could get better...he LOVES mint chocolate chip ice cream!...naaaaaaaaahahahahahahahaha :) Current Mood: ecstatic Current Music: "...arms wide open...here we go.." (1 thought | lay one down)